idioticteen:

*trys to hit high note of favorite song*

image

vvant:

im just so glad the word “ugh” was invented

asinglegarbanzobeanonitaliantile:

me as  a lawyer: kk that was rude . 


(Source: captainsteves)


bookshop:

This is my new favorite thing in the history of life

(Source: yay--stefon)


militiamedic:

jesseproch:

emt-monster:

Please reblog if you know anyone who might take party drugs.

I’m not an emt yet, but everytime I see someone do drugs, I just hope they’re smart enough to remember these points.

As an nurse with ER experience, same thing. Dear God please just tell us what you took. I will not tell anyone from law enforcement or your parents or whoever, I just need to know so I can save your life. Please.

jabberwockysuperfly:

The lack of tattoos on my body is highly upsetting.

dejacoendou:

hey-doesnt-he-rap:

chicken-nuggets-galore:

Do twins have the same sized dick?

now we’re asking the real questions

As a twin, I can say my dick is definitely bigger than my sister’s.

cokeflow:

tumblr has defiled my sense of humor and now I’m on this new tier of humor that no one in real life understands

(Source: cokeflow)

anglosexual:

undeadthug:

guess where abstinence-only education is taught

(Source: thegodlessatheist)

zezora:

if you read this you are cute no take backs

iguanamouth:

not knowing how to spell a word but playing it off and mispelling it really bad so it looks intentional like “hey when are you meeting us at the restetrauretant”

bepeu:

*sips coffee* nice nice . am i virgin

pink-vulva:

reasons i want to look GOOD <3

  • for myself
  • for myself
  • to plant the seed of envy in other bitch’s hearts
  • for myself

bombing:

image